What I have found is Chinese who haven’t spent a lot of time around westerners tend to ask the sort of questions that may put westerns off. They simply don’t know our habits nor our culture.
It takes time to get to know the habits of another culture and most people, myself as an example, learn by making mistakes.
I really cannot count the number of embarrassing mistakes I have made when communicating to Chinese friends or colleagues. Slowly, too slowly, I learn from them and try to adapt.
Most Chinese do the same, they start a conversation and go with what they know. When they realized what they asked was considered rude or inappropriate the steer clear of the questions the next time.
What amazes me is how polite Chinese are despite the foolish mistakes we make as foreigners. Even when I have made major blunders, I have been forgiven by friends and acquaintances as they understand I am a foreigner and that I may not understand their culture or language. I see a lot of foreigners who do not offer the same courtesy in return.
We are living in China but so many foreigners expect Chinese to adapt to what we consider to be polite but make very little effort to try to understand Chinese culture and what they consider to be polite. We are the guests not them.
I feel if anything that is the ultimate sign of disrespect and in turn makes those types of foreigners the ones who are truly being rude.
So let me reverse the question to Kiki and Anna (and any others reading), what do we do or ask, as foreigners, that is considered to be rude in Chinese culture?
